just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
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