u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize