Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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