Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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