Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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