saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Randomize