his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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