Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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