Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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