I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize