I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
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