my room smells like sperm. sweet.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
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He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
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He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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