Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I want to kish your cheek

  (248): View more from Michigan

  My cheeks are in Michigan

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Oh my lips are kind of stretchy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): I want to kish your cheek (248): My cheeks are in Michigan (301): Oh my lips are kind of stretchy http://tfl.nu/4fba
  Replies (4) Good night (1943) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy. http://tfl.nu/mwni
  Replies (11) Good night (1299) Bad night (3364)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later http://tfl.nu/x9e9
  Replies (9) Good night (6329) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode? http://tfl.nu/1peu
  Replies (15) Good night (5080) Bad night (1215)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out http://tfl.nu/p8nx
  Replies (3) Good night (2937) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you http://tfl.nu/4yxe
  Replies (35) Good night (9293) Bad night (1789)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away http://tfl.nu/plhs
  Replies (8) Good night (601) Bad night (2114)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas. http://tfl.nu/wigg
  Replies (11) Good night (1386) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday. http://tfl.nu/g52l
  Replies (5) Good night (397) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift. http://tfl.nu/gpor
  Replies (5) Good night (830) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam....... http://tfl.nu/1do5
  Replies (10) Good night (662) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up? http://tfl.nu/j9qb
  Replies (4) Good night (716) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still http://tfl.nu/f9lt
  Replies (3) Good night (265) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something. http://tfl.nu/ank0
  Replies (4) Good night (607) Bad night (403)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers. http://tfl.nu/qq58
  Replies (2) Good night (1216) Bad night (293)

Randomize