Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
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