Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
