Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
