East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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