She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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