Girls should come with a carfax report
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize