My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
