garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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