I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize