i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize