At least make sure they are 18
Why
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize