I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
