that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
