i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
