Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
3 2 1 whiskey
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
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