Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize