so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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