Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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