I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
no you cant smoke seaweed
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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