Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
