This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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