Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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