ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
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