I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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