So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i just google imaged poop.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
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