Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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