The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I need to calm my uterus...
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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