I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
