Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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