you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Randomize
