i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize