Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
