its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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