Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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