I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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