Just mADE A PArabola og urine
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
