What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
