What a fucking waste of an outfit
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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