Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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